I’ve never thought of any of this as “rolling the dice.”

In case you missed the first part to this, go back and read Funny Looks.

For context on this post, you’ll have to watch this short clip. Do watch it, though. It’s really good.

Rolling the Dice

Ah, the Thanksgiving table — those awkward conversations.

It all begins when Ellie’s mom says she’s thankful for her beautiful grandchildren, “including the very lucky kids who are soon-to-be adopted by two wonderful parents.”

Ellie and Pete cut into the conversation to share that they have chosen to not move forward with the whole foster thing…..that they had not thought it all through properly.

Immediately, the family chimes in with comments like:

  • “Jesus Christ, this is great news.”
  • “We all thought you were out of your minds.”
  • “We are just thankful that you and Peter are going to experience the love of your own, beautiful children.”
  • “…..rather than just rolling the dice with the offspring of some criminal or drug addict.”
  • “To be honest, we were worried about our real kid’s safety were they to hang out with your kids.”
  • “We are talking about, you know, crack babies and kids who have been sexually harassed.”
  • “I’m sorry if we’re not as politically correct as you guys, but our baby has to be our blood.”

Damaged Goods

This is another favorite scene of mine in Instant Family because, while you might read those comments and hear it expressed so harshly out loud at a place we all might find discomfort — the Thanksgiving table, please don’t kid yourself — this is real.

In some way, shape, or form every single one of those things has been said to Ryan or I.

Ellie says, “It’s not their fault; and they are not damaged goods.”

And I can’t stand the fact that people would refer to other human beings (much less children) as damaged goods. They did not choose to enter the world with drugs in their system or abuse shortly ahead on their life’s journey.

How lucky for you, who passes judgement, that you did not make your debut into the world this way.

It makes my heart physically hurt when I think about the statements above.

Listen, I would roll the dice a million times again and forego that “blood baby” if it meant life would turn out like this.

I will never stop advocating for foster-adoption, to remove the stigma, and to help one more child find their forever home.

p.s. Please don’t ever make any of the above comments to me. Mama bear will come out in full force.

Join the magic and chaos, right where you need to be, HERE.




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